quotations about Santa Claus
Santa ... is a man with a harsh and stringent code. Santa makes lists of children throughout the world and, oh no, he puts them in categories according to their behavior. His ledger has two columns: one for the good and the other for the bad (the "naughty" and "nice"). He gives toys and candy to the well-behaved children, but he doesn't forget the bad kids, no, he puts lumps of coal in their Christmas stockings. He believes in accountability, but is generous of heart and of a forgiving nature. Last year can be forgotten if you were good this year.... Santa likely wouldn't go in for participation awards and scoreless soccer games for the kids. No, he believes in real outcomes, even in rewards and punishments. So dare we say it: Santa is a conservative.
FRANK MINITER
"Is Santa Claus, dare we say it, a conservative?", FOX News, December 19, 2016
Parents, make sure the kids aren't reading over your shoulder because it looks like we're about to have a blue Christmas: Santa Claus is dead. Archeologists said Wednesday that they might have discovered the ancient tomb belonging to the original Santa Claus, otherwise known as St. Nick, beneath a church in southern Turkey, according to The Washington Post.
HERB SCRIBNER
"Santa Claus is dead, researchers say", Deseret News, October 6, 2017
Santa only comes to those who believe. He doesn't care if you believe in him or not, and he's not trying to make anyone believe who doesn't believe. If you don't believe, he just skips your house.
JENN-ANNE
"Dad told me there is no Santa Claus. Is that true, Mom?", Chicago Now, December 19, 2016
The real Santa Claus is at the mall.
LEMONY SNICKET
The Lump of Coal
Santa baby, slip a sable under the tree for me
Been an awful good girl
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight
EARTHA KITT
"Santa Baby"
Under a welfare state there is always the danger that adults as well as children will believe in Santa Claus.
EVAN ESAR
20,000 Quips & Quotes
The myth of Santa has grown to gigantic proportions. He is able to know all, to judge each and every child, to make reindeer fly and do all these things at the North Pole! Obviously Santa has slowly taken the place of God, doing things which only God can do. Unfortunately, this "god" is a legalistic "god," dispensing gifts only upon those who deserve them.
JOHN L. HOH, JR.
Santa Claus: Is He For Your Child?
She felt that it was not the responsibility of the educational system to make sure that by the age of twelve, a student has a clear enough understanding of reality to be able to figure out that Santa Claus is a myth.
BRUCE GAUTHIER
Santa Claus is Alive and Well and Living on Wall Street
When I found out that Santa Claus wasn't real, I wasn't upset; rather, I was relieved that there was a much simpler phenomenon to explain how so many children all over the world got presents on the same night! The story had been getting pretty complicated -- it was getting out of hand.
RICHARD P. FEYNMAN
What Do You Care What Other People Think?
My heart breaks for the day I had to explain my mistakes
And the mask goes away and Santa Claus is fake
JAY-Z
"4:44"
No doubt about it, Santa is old fashioned. He is also an individualist. He goes his own way. He doesn't obey airport tower controllers or customs officials.
FRANK MINITER
"Is Santa Claus, dare we say it, a conservative?", FOX News, December 19, 2016
Just one Santa delivery team? How could there be? There are 526,403,012 children, all expecting presents before tomorrow morning. So, that's 22 million children per hour. It's impossible. Obviously, I got a second sled.
STEVEN MOFFAT
"Last Christmas", Doctor Who
So Santa Claus is bogus but Grim Reapers are the genuine article. What does that say about the world?
MINDEE ARNETT
The Nightmare Charade
Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies!
FRANCIS PHARCELLUS CHURCH
"Is There a Santa Claus", The New York Sun, September 21, 1897
Get ready for a theory that will blow your mind. Ready? Okay. The whole "Santa coming down the chimney" thing is clearly just a muggle conspiracy to cover up the fact that Santa is a wizard traveling by floo powder.
DESIREE O
"This Harry Potter Theory Claims Santa Claus Is a Wizard", Brit+Co, December 14, 2016
Don't hang me up Santa lay some toys on me
Sock it to me Santa you know where it's at
Sock it to me Santa I want a baseball bat
Christmas just won't be a drag, cause Santa's got a brand new bag
I say come on Dancer, come on Prancer
A brand new Santa's got to be the answer
Come on Comet, and come on Cupid
Don't just stand there lookin' stupid
BOB SEGER
"Sock It To Me Santa"
Just think about it: Santa Claus is an imaginary figure who lives in the North Pole with no visible means of support. He is a 300 pound man who is supposed to be able to descend through a narrow chimney flue with a sack of toys on his back as a reward to good boys and girls. Someone has noted that Santa Claus flies in a sleigh pulled by eight reindeer led by Rudolph with his nasal nightlight. At least Santa has fairly nonpolluting transportation.
WILLIAM H. GODDARD
Just Say the Words
Santa Claus had the right idea. Visit people only once a year.
VICTOR BORGE
attributed, Quick Quotations
Ho, ho, ho
Santa's comin' back, around
So get ready
Christmastime is my favorite part of the year
'Cause ah, there's a lot of love in the air
And holiday cheer
TODDIEFUNK
"Santa's comin' baka round"
The whole concept of some stranger making his way down our chimney -- not that we had one -- suggested burglary more readily than generosity. Any Santa who tried it would have gotten a bullet in his holly, jolly keister.
THOMM QUACKENBUSH
Of Christmas Present